Friday, May 16, 2014

Close your eyes and jump

It has been the culmination of a few years of hard work. Focusing on paying down debt and organizing finances. Surprisingly (to me anyhow) lots of mental and physical preparation. But it has all culminated in me finally giving my notice at my job. I am not quite done work yet. Still 2 weeks to go. I officially gave my notice 6 weeks ago and have been slowly training my replacement. He is pretty good now and I expect the next two weeks will be monitoring and housekeeping (and if you saw my office you know that I need a few days for the housekeeping part!).

This has been tough on me. Even though I don't particularly want my job, I am still finding it very hard to come to terms with the idea that I will have no job at all in a few weeks. I have always defined myself by my job. I took pride in the years I put in and the increasing levels of responsibility. But even with a cushy pay cheque and title I was never very happy. It was a false pride based on what others thought of me, not what I wanted for myself.

Even so, I have to admit I am nervous about the next few months. I have a plan for the first 3 months and I think that will help. I have given myself permission to be home no matter what for at least 3 months. That means that if we find life with only one income impossible or I hate it (which I doubt, but who knows) I have permission to stay home full time till at least September. Then I can re-evaluate and possibly look for part time or once again full time work. I am also giving myself permission to like not working. Which seems strange but is a bit of a mental block for me. Other than my 3 maternity leaves I haven't been without work since I was 15. It all feels very foreign to me and it will take some getting used to. Of course I won't just sit on my duff and do nothing. But I think the plans I have for my time will be the focus of another post.

So there you go. All those posts where I lamented trying to balance full time work and family life, and I finally did it. I quit. WHOA!

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

just popped in my head

When I spend a summer in Brazil I met a musician who spoke near perfect English. In the village we were living virtually no one spoke English.  During our conversation he told us he taught himself how to speak English by emulating English language pop songs. Amazing eh! I guess we can do almost anything if we want it hard enough.

Friday, June 14, 2013

This or that

I can never seem to get it all done:

If I work hard at cleaning my house on the weekend, I don't have time to do meal planning and prep cooking for the coming week.

If I work out in the evening I forget to plan for the next days supper.

Heck, if I am tired in the evening (right! right!?) I forget to plan for the next days supper. 

If I remember to put a load of laundry in the washer in the evening, I am asleep before it is ready to go in the dryer. (I have been known to text my DH from bed asking him to please put load in dryer, crossing my fingers he checks his phone before bed).

If I do a bunch of meal planning and prepping on the weekend I don't get much housework done.

God help us is we decide to ignore all meal planning and cleaning and just hang with our kids all weekend long.

At the moment I don't have a to do list, mostly because I am in denial. I'm not the only one right?

Thursday, June 13, 2013

A side project

This week I starting contributing to the blog Losing It in Ottawa. I was finding it hard to write about fitness here on my blog, I wasn't sure it fit well. I could go on and on about fitness and my successes and (so far mostly) failures, and I think the Losing it blog is a better venue for that type of conversation. Please come visit me there if you wish, and join the conversation. There are some pretty amazing women writing about their diverse experiences. Interesting stuff.

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