I can't seem to get a blog post together these days. I often start them in the morning and then by the time I get to them in the evening I have lost my train of thought or the idea isn't as interesting anymore. Here are a few things rattling around in my brain tonight.
1. I am tired. When D2 was born I was blessed with very easy nights. That lasted for one glorious month. For the last two months it has been a night time feeding schedule of every two hours and sometimes every hour. I have resorted to nursing him laying down because I am too exhausted to sit up. I also bring the wipes and a diaper to bed with me and change him there. I used to use the walk to the change table as a way to wake him up so he would eat better. Now I just need sleep.
2. Today I went to a lactation drop in. I couldn't get over how many women were there. I think the LC was a bit overwhelmed as well. She was running around trying help and talk to us all. There were a few new moms there and they were struggling and it broke my heart. I saw myself in them and I tried to reassure them. After I left I thought of a few other things I could have said but it was too late. I wish I knew who these women were. One of them looked like she was ready to give up. She looked so tired, a few times I thought I saw tears in her eyes. I know exactly how she feels and I just wish I could have talked to her longer.
3. Tired nights turn into tired days. I have been much grumpier in the last week. Lets hope D2 starts sleeping better soon.
Well i guess that is all I can think about right now. Trust me my life is much more interesting than this. I just can't seem to get anything useful out of my brain this week. I am sure my intelligence will return soon. I hope.
9 comments:
HUGS, Chantal! You have A LOT on your plate, and we all know it! It's so hard to blog with a new baby. I remember it well. Great to hear ANYTHING from you. And this was perfect update. Sorry you're tired -- but not surprised! And I totally am, too -- 2 YEARS of a bad sleeper will do that to you! ;)
Chantal, I so feel for you. The memory of those early months is still very fresh for me. Try not to be hard on yourself, do what you need to do to get by, survive, because right now you are in survival mode. Let yourself be in that moment, though I know it's hard to. There is so much you'd like to do but can't, but it will come. Hang in there and please, please, let me know if there is anything I can do.
i bid you much sleep my friend. hopefully D2 is just going through a little growth spurt and will settle down and do some longer sleeps. hopefully you can catch a couple of cat naps today. the laundry and floors can wait!
You're in the thick of it. Hang in there!
Chantal, I'm so sorry you're getting so little sleep. I went through the same thing with my son. It's so hard to function when you're waking up every one or two hours at night for months on end. I feel kind of teary just from the memory of it.
We went through 8 months of horrible sleep and then Jamie suddenly improved one weekend when we went away for a mini-vacation in my hometown. It was mid-May and we stayed in a little cottage that felt quite cool at night. I remember worrying that the baby would sleep even worse than usual. To my surprise he slept 5 hours straight for the first time in his life. I thought it was a fluke, but he continued to sleep better even after we got home.
I've always wondered if we'd gone away earlier would his sleep have improved earlier? Or was it coincidence? I don't know, but I think if I was to go through the same thing again (which isn't likely!) I would try switching up our routine every now and then to try to find something that would break the pattern.
Good luck!
It is so so hard but you are doing great! Hang in there and grab your sleep while you can! And I can make you more cupcaks if needed. :-)
Everyone's said what I wanted to say! As all moms know, times like this will pass, although that doesn't make it easier at the time. I would always sleep with Beckett in my room with the wipes and diapers right there so I would nurse, change him and fall right back to sleep. You need to do what you can to survive. It's hard, I know.
And look at you, thoroughly exhusted and still trying to make other people feel better about what they are going through. You truly are amazing Chantal!
It's so hard in those early months. I used to say that I felt like I'd been kicked in the head repeatedly all night when I had to get up in the morning.
But, it doesn't last forever and hopefully he'll start sleeping more soon.
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. Each of my kids were nightmarishly awful sleepers until age 3 1/2, so I can empathize. At some point, you find yourself behind the wheel of the car, thinking, "I shouldn't be operating heavy machinery."
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