Yesterday was a prime example of the emotional roller coaster that I am on these days. There is no rhyme or reason for it. I just fluctuate from completely blissed out, to tired, to grumpy, to sad. All in the same day.
I think it is D2's age and the time of year. Not only is it fall, the most beautiful season, but also the saddest for me since I hate winter. It is also "almost back to work" time. I have 2.5 months left on my leave and each day leaves me anxious to enjoy every moment left, and sad that the moments are passing so fast.
We have begun interviewing day cares and although it makes me happy to see what wonderful women are out there ready to take on the challenge of caring for my baby. It also makes me sad to know that I will have to hand him over every day to go to work. And before you say "why can't you stay home? make it work, we did", its not possible, and that is all I am going to say about that. I may be possible in the future, but it isn't possible now. I plan on choosing a day care for D2 by mid next week. That will help take away some stress and it will allow us to start getting him familiar with whom ever we chose. He is VERY attached to me and cries hysterically when left anyone other than Kevin. He even cries with family, family he is very familiar with. So a stranger should be interesting. I want to do a long, gradual introduction to make this as easy as possible. It won't be easy, but easier... WAAAAHHHHH (that's me, not him).
We have been going to play group on Tuesdays and Thursdays at the Tiny Hoppers near our house. I actually won the 12 week pass in a silent auction at a craft sale organized by Turtlehead. Thanks Lynn, it was the best $40 I ever spent. I am meeting new people and D2 is getting used to being around other little kids. At home he spends all his time around bigger kids (like 5 and over) and he will have to get used to little ones for day care. He enjoys the play structures and watching the other children play. He isn't crawling yet, but I am sure he isn't far away. He shuffles on his bum and when he gets on his belly will go into a downward dog (think Yoga) position, but still no knees. I keep showing him, but he isn't buying it. Once he does though, it won't take long till he is flying around the place. We have been decluttering and baby proofing in anticipation :)
I hope everyone has a great weekend. Take care all and I will be sure to update you all next week on the day care progress.
10 comments:
Oh, Chantal. :(
I am feeling exactly like you, believe me. It's the time of year, it's stress, it's my children's outbursts, it's everything all at once. By Friday, I feel like I'm a bad parent because I work full-time. It gets to me. Then by Sunday, I'm SO ready to get back to work. And the stress you're facing with returning to work and finding a day care, that is MEGA stressful. And I know how hard it is to leave when your child cries and clings and won't let you go. It's heartbreaking. HUGS to you. xo
hey there. i guess the background is a reflection of your mood? i hope it becomes sunny once again.
i hope you are able to find a good place for d2. like you said, it will take a lot of the burden off and let you try and wrap your brain around going back to work. we should plan a coffee night so that d2 can get used to some time away from you.
hugs
just hugs;).
transitions are always stressful, none more so than when they involve our children. but you are so in tune with him and so conscientious that i know it will be okay, once established. the stress is a bitch though.
and i hope you find that you can make the changes you would like to in the future, be that happy at work or happy at home.
It is bittersweet when you are the babe's most favorite person in his whole world. You are a great mom and both you and D2 will get through this transition. :)
It'll get easier. You'll settle into a routine, and he'll adjust. I know that probably doesn't make you feel any better does it! In a way though, it's amazing that we do get to spend a year with them. I can't imagine having to go back to work after 6 or 8 weeks.
I am behind on all my blog reading so I am just getting to this post now.
You are a great mom Chantal. That is all.
Oh Chantal. I'm sorry I'm so late reading this. You know that I'm here for you right? If you ever need anything, coffee, anything. I know how you feel. Trust me, in so many ways.
Going back to work after each of my mat leaves was the hardest thing I ever had to do. It does get easier, but never easy. But then being at home isn't easy either.
Best of luck finding a great daycare. That will make all the difference if you know they are happy and well cared for during the day.
Oh wow. a month late. ;)
It's hard, no matter which way you look at it. But it'll get easier, and you'll be ok. And we're going to do some more playdates at Kid Kaf before the end of the year- you can make those usually right? :)
Oh, honey, I have missed you.
He will survive the transition and come out the other side--eventually becoming a man who just loves his mommy. In the middle of things, it's hard to remember how well it will all be, eventually. I had the same boy you have: crying with anyone but me and my husband, absolutely turning one daycare on its head until we withdrew him, but then we moved on, and he found the right place, and now he's 7, and who can even remember?
(well, okay, I can)
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